INTJs Hate Surprises
I’ve found that people are really good at taking INTJ keywords that they hear online, and spouting them out without having any idea who they actually apply to real life circumstances.
Yep… I bet you already see the “big picture” on where I’m going with this.
It’s not too uncommon to hear the anecdote of INTJs hating surprises. But WHY exactly do we do we hate surprises is the question that we will be addressing today.
Responsibility to Achieve the Vision.
The evil villain… with their evil master plan. Another anecdote. Why?
Well for evil or good INTJs are intentional visionaries. They see the one singular light at the end of the tunnel, and are dead set on getting or achieving that thing through their own process.
So how does this tie into surprises?
Basically, when you surprise us, you are preventing us from doing what we do best because we are programmed to be responsible for the vision.
Let’s talk about the difference of feeling responsible vs “liking” doing it.
When you are responsible for something, it means that whether you like it or not, you have to take care of it. It’s not “I really just enjoy making things come together to achieve a perfectly articulated thing”. It’s more like “I have to do this otherwise I will die on the inside.”
The Ni function of INTJs is reductional in nature, specifically focused, and conceptually organized.
The Te function of INTJs is rationally objective and is the logic behind why the plan should work.
So all that being said, here are some examples of surprises that INTJs would love to do without.
Last Minute Change of Plans.
There was a perfectly articulated plan, we were sure of it. INTJs love to plan, not the detailed specifics, but the overall rundown of exactly what needs to happen for the sake of “the thing”.
That being said, when you change a plan, we are responsible to last-minute reorganize the working of everything. We do not enjoy that, because again, we feel responsible for it to be articulated excellently within the vision that we see for it.
Even if we love you, please for the love of God give us a heads up if you’re coming by.
You can guarantee I have my entire day time blocked with exactly I need to do. If you are going to show up with less than 24 hours of notice, I need… let me stress to you NEED to reorganize my time blocks so everything still gets done. Want to see me panic? Show up with no notice at all and see what happens.
Surprise “Nice Things”.
This category covers surprise parties *shudders*, nights out, weekends away, a lot of things that (to be fair) MOST people really enjoy. Listen, I’m sure you have great inventions, but I also know you probably… probably haven't thought of everything that needs to be thought of. Additionally, there are going to be certain things I need to do or prepare that I physically can't do if you just spring a surprise adventure on me. I truly appreciate the effort, so let's talk about it, get on the same page, and make a plan that works.
Still want to surprise us? Surprise us by doing things that are ongoing and already have an established process.
Bonus points if by doing them we get some of our time back.
Just… try to do it correctly please. Or we will just end up re-doing it.
We do appreciate people trying to support and love us, but we appreciate it even more if those people take the time to understand what works for us before attempting such things.